What happened to *appreciation*?

I recently read a status update that went,

Dear Nigerian girls, hope you saw what Kim K. bought for Kanye West on his birthday? Not a singlet or Boxers. She bought A LAMBORGHINI CAR worth $750k. We are tired of taking boxers and singlets as gifts, we even receive socks. We will hence commence a 3-day warning strike taking effect from tomorrow.

I may not be Nigerian, but that was utter disrespect towards girls. I naturally took the offensive, representing all girls brought up with modesty and appreciation, and lambasted him on that page.

I'm sorry, but these boys freakin' suck if they want more than what the girls heart or funds can humanely give. Let them tell us what they want!

Yes. THEY FREAKIN' SUCK. Not mincing my words here. I couldn't be the least bit bothered about Kim Kardashian's gift to Kanye West. I stay away from almost all mainstream celebrity culture. Except perhaps Enya. And the Hunger Games, and films that are watch-worthy, and the occasional bit of mainstream music that is sometimes listen-worthy.

Seriously, guys, I know you're tired of boxers and singlets and shorts. But look at it this way: the girl wants to be with you. It isn't everyday that you find people with extravagant funds. Oftentimes she'll have enough to support herself, and perhaps get a gift for you. And we girls, from our grandmothers to our mothers to ourselves, have nearly always found it hard to buy gifts for boys — little boys and big boys alike. And the simple reason is this: we just don't know what you want!

My father has been brought up with deep appreciation in his heart. So have I. But I want to talk about my father because he is the best example I can come up with for a situation like this. My mother has always loved my father and me, and still loves us even from where she is. When she was still alive, she gave him whatever she could think of giving. A new shirt? Perhaps a new tie? As long as they looked beautiful on him, as long as they fit him, and as long as the gift came from the heart, that was what mattered. And my father took delight in all these gifts, not solely for the gifts themselves, but more importantly, what was in her heart.

That, my friends, is an example of a Man.

I grew up to thank people for every gift I received, even those which weren't as good as I hoped, even though people around me often tended to think otherwise, sometimes speaking ill about the people who gave them lousy gifts. Someone at least gave me a gift, and whatever his intentions were, I thank that person wholeheartedly. There are people who are sad out there, with no one to give them gifts! The fact that I received one is comforting.

The whole point of gifts is that there is an exchange of love and friendship between the giver and the receiver. Yes, there will be times where people genuinely ask for things, but the giving of the gift has to be coupled with the right intentions. Gift-giving, if done wrong, will tend to focus on the gifts themselves. That's part of the result of a commercialised culture. And that is what I saw with that nasty status update, and I believe a lot of upright-thinking women will feel the same way too. I'm discerning my vocation at this moment, but if I had a boyfriend who was so demanding as to insist that I follow Kim Kardashian's example on buying gifts knowing that I was low on funds to begin with, I would have him take a punch to the face, and out of my house!

Statements like the one I started with.... these make me sick to the stomach. As they should. I don't look up to people who concentrate on products, when receiving gifts. I wholeheartedly respect people who concentrate on other people. And I'm sure the upright-thinking woman would feel the same way.


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