Dans quelle direction est-ce que je vais ?

Lord, I've had a question which has been bugging me of late...

I understand that you make everything wonderful in your time, and that you want me to live and to love in the present.

I understand that to find the truth, I must renounce the world and all that's in it, and live for you.

This, Lord, I'm not sure if I'm doing well, but I yearn to do it well. I want to be sealed in your love until the end of my days.

But there's one thing I've always wanted to ask...
In times where nothing seems to be moving, do we wait for things to materialise, or do we have to act ?

Lord, you understand how much I want to sing, to play the drums well, to touch people's hearts with my music, to spread the message of love, even if it has to be subtle. There are people hurling accusations at me saying that I'm only doing it for the fame and accolades and nothing else. Worse still, these people are close to home. I sometimes weep when I think of this...

Fame and money come in their own time, and whether they are a blessing or a curse depends on how we handle it, no ? Also, if we do well in any profession, we obtain renown. Word spreads about us. It happens.

I admit that I love the chemistry between me and the audience, and I love it when the audience applauds after a particularly moving piece. It gives me the impression that I did manage to speak to them.

But what should I do ? I should I hold on to these dreams of mine, or should I give them up ? :'(

Is it a sin to dream like this ? To want to reach out to people like this ?

What am I here for ? I know this is a rather desperate question but still...

As much as I understand how difficult and superficial showbiz is, I want to be one of those few people who make a difference. I don't want to be the usual stereotypical "philantrophist - musician with a flat voice - trendsetter" kind of person. I want to be much more than what the people in the business have to offer. I know it's hard, but that doesn't deter me from the fact that I have a message to sing, several hearts to arouse.

Whatever happens after this, I leave it into your hands. Not my will, but yours be done.

Je suis armée d’un tambour et de ma voix, c’est tout.
Je ne sais pas si avec ça, je peux émouvoir les pauvres âmes…


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