My first Ciném'Alliance evening

For a long time I knew that the Alliance Française screens films on Friday evenings, but I never had the chance to go. And not very long ago, there was something which piqued my interest :

This notice. (Click on it to view the gist of the story.)

Now, I may have not entirely read the Astérix comics, but I remember having had the entire set of them – a friend scanned them and sent them to me, but I lost all copies when my old, 40GB hard drive was burnt. It was a joy for me to see that announcement. And another thought came to mind : if Hollywood’s remakes weren’t at all good, maybe a remake of a French comic with a little Gallic shrug and a few spoofs couldn’t be any worse, could it ?

Let me also bring to your awareness that typical Malaysian viewers of movies hardly read. If they do, they’d perhaps be eager to see the movie remake. Anyhow, there were 30-something people in the hall (just a rough estimate) and the film screening began at 8:00 p.m.

Now, here’s my personal point of view :

Pic : The Gallic team, from left - the head Druid (I forgot his name), Obelix, Asterix and Alafolix.

I paid close attention to the film, and I never knew Gérard Depardieu had a funny side. He played Obelix, Astérix’s sidekick. In my eyes he was a character with a fat torso and a noticeable degree of smartness – and the kind of quick wit that Obelix’s character actually displayed made me get hooked on to the show. Especially in the middle of the film, where he trained Alafolix/Lovesix, and when he was preparing the ladder for Irina to climb. And the pranks he plays… how original! All of us split our sides laughing. He also happens to be the greatest inspiration for Alafolix, as he writes poems for the young man and gives him words of advice before the match : a wonderful mentor indeed, despite his rotund stature.

I was rather disappointed with the performance of Clovis Cornillac (Astérix). Astérix is supposed to be the main character and provide the Gallic spirit in the films. No doubt, there was that Gallic charm in the film, but it didn’t come from our main character at all. Whilst the film was titled “Astérix aux Jeux Olympiques” (Astérix at the Olympic Games), the film was almost always not focused on Astérix. He held a rather minor role – apart from saving the Druid, and his conversation with Obelix, the spotlight just didn’t fall on him. Justice was not done to the title, I’d say.

Then we have Lovesix – taken from the word “lovesick” (or, in the French version, Alafolix, “à la folie” [madly in love]). Stéphane Rousseau’s portrayal of this was well done, I’d say, except for the part where Alafolix was made to punch into the air before preparing for his battle with Humungus, the Roman hybrid wrestler. Aside from that mishap, Alafolix is tanned, has lovely long hair, is very poetic (though we had Obelix write the poems for him), very passionate, and a perfect candidate for our Olympic match. Truly, Alafolix gets his inspiration from Obelix, but on his own, he is a character who won’t stop at anything to win the Greek princess Irina’s heart (though in a few instances, we see him on the verge of giving up – the very epitome of humanity).

Pic : The man himself - Julius Caesar !

Since this play takes place in the era of the Roman Empire (based on the intro, 50 B.C.), we have…… you guessed it… Julius Caesar! The appearance of his character was necessary, though it could’ve easily been a spoof of Shakespeare’s play of the same name. All the same, Julius Caesar was portrayed just as the plays and the Astérix comics portrayed him: ambitious, conceited, but cunning – albeit in a funny manner. He often admires himself in front of the mirror, with lines suggesting that his image will never tarnish, and that he is immortal (well, he is, sort of). His recurrent line, “Avé, moi” (“Hail, me”), is recurrent of the kind of self-pride Shakespeare gives Caesar in the play, whilst his constant care in testing out Brutus’ “gifts” (he got a tester for the bath foam and the mirror, which were plots for Brutus to kill him) is reminiscent of these lines in the play :

“Yond Cassius has a lean and hungry look, He thinks too much: such men are dangerous.”

I mean, I know Cassius wasn’t featured in this movie, but that line serves to indicate the care that Caesar takes in order not to get himself killed. He is rather harsh on his son, though in our eyes, it’s quite endearing. I take my hat off to Alain Delon for that portrayal of the all-time famous Roman emperor.

Pic : Irina being taunted by Brutus in the beginning of the play : Brutus seems confident of winning the Olympic games.

And as I said, we have Brutus, who is apparently Caesar’s son (played by Benoît Poelvoorde). He’s another character I’m rather annoyed with. Like Alafolix, he is vying for Irina’s hand in marriage. He tries to mimic Alafolix’s poetry, but to no avail as he doesn’t have the necessary expression… and for a time, he manages to get the Roman centurions over to his side. He and Alafolix are contenders in the Olympic Games, though I only have one word to describe Brutus : GAY. His jokes are as cheesy as hell, and even if he was meant to be a comic-relief character and get the brunt of our laughter, he just doesn’t nail it. The only time I actually applauded his performance was when he fell down the ladder after Obelix played a prank on him. That was in the middle of the show. I also applaud the fact that he was well shown as a character full of himself, and that he got his due punishment at the end. We viewers find it hard to sympathise with him after all the trouble he caused his father, as well as Alafolix. Oh, and again, he’s GAY.

Princess Irina’s portrayal by Vanessa Hessler was commendable. From the start to near the end of the play, I had always felt that Irina was the epitome of a Grecian princess : someone who was meant to be seen and not heard. But when Irina stood for justice towards the end of the film, I could’ve just stood up and applauded. Her expression was very well done, just like Alafolix ; her firm tone in calling Brutus’ name towards the end of the film was amazing.

Pic : The two Bards cheering on for the Gallic team. The one with the harp is known as Cacofonix (a play on "cacophony" or French : "cacophonie", meaning an unpleasant mixture of sounds).

The minor characters were well done too : the two Bards were quite good (though they were made to be off pitch, and thus, they were the laughing-stock of the viewers), and the Druids carried out their ritual with solemnity in the latter part of the play. And the two dogs - Irina's dog and Obelix's dog (Dogmatix, or in the French version, Idéfix) were just wonderful.

On to the plot : we expected Gaul to win over the rest of the teams (Hispania, Germania, Rome, Greece and Egypt), and they did, but it wasn’t in the way we expected. Obelix’s idea of throwing in the potion changed our perception of an ending and made it enjoyable. The environments were lush and very well done, and Olympus by night was just stunning. The downside of it, however, was that there were too many spoofs in this Astérix film, which was what led to a lot of negative criticism over IMDB. Among those include :

Pic : Gluteus Maximus giving a false salute to Asterix and Obelix in the beginning of the film.

+ One of the Roman contenders, who believed himself to be the fastest and the strongest, was called “Gluteus Maximus” (which is, in actual fact, the largest muscle in the body, situated at the buttocks).

+ The chariot rider from Germania raced as though it was an F1 race : his chariot was red and shiny and entirely made of metal, with silver spikes in the front, drawn by black horses (reminiscent of Ferrari), his chariot took a pit stop in the middle of the race, the manager was often seen communicating with the rider…… and that, I guess, destroyed the spirit of an ancient Olympic race. Oh, and guess what, the chariot rider was Schuey himself !

+ The two sportsmen who were invited over to Alafolix’s and Irina’s wedding and victory celebration were called Zidanus and Michaeljordanus respectively – spoofs of our all-time favourite Zinedine Zidane (who ACTUALLY featured in the film) and Michael Jordan. Though they did excellent gameplay (with Zidanus displaying fancy footwork and Michaeljordanus keeping the ball to his side with impressive tricks), it was just too cheesy and shouldn’t have been thrown into an Astérix film. More spoofs included cameos by Amélie Mauresmo and a few others.

+ Astérix was called “Hamsterix” towards the end of the play – I think that name somewhat befit him, seeing his entirely minor role in the play.


All in all ? It was a good film and an enjoyable watch, but could’ve been made more original. For too many unnecessary spoofs, as well as the cheesiness of Brutus and the lack of substance in Astérix’s role, this film scores ★★★☆☆.

So, worst French film made in 2007 ? I don't think so. I'm not surprised that, despite its poor critical reviews and getting a Razzie award, this film was a chart-topper. I was satisfied. All of us were genuinely entertained. Also, consider the fact that I had my Business Studies timed test yesterday, and I needed a cooloff - and this film worked. I guess it was worth arriving at home at 11-something at night. Call me a cheapskate if you want, but this film is good in my eyes, even if it could've been made much better. ^_^